Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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