you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
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