one word: firstdatebathroomanal
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Randomize
