Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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