So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize