So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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