The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize