Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.