he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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