Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
