let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize