Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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