That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize