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• (425): View more from Washington

  i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."

  Fav 17 6081 1063

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have

  Fav 17 1418 6210

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Church boner. Awkwardddd

  Fav 43 3002 5991

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  27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.

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• (949): View more from California

  Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks

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• 

  23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (704): View more from North Carolina

  I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though

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• (415): View more from California

  Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Had a burrito last night in your honor

  (208): View more from Idaho

  That's the nicest thing you've ever done

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• (323): View more from California

  She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way

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• (229): View more from Georgia

  He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?

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