Those balls look pretty dangerous.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
it's great music for shaving your balls
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Randomize
