Three words: puerto rican gang bang
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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