i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
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I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
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Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
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