Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
