reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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