I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
A bitchslap is in order.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
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