I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize