He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
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If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
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I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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