U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I am naked and annoyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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