Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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