shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
