the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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