wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Randomize
