I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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