The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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