Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
