Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Randomize
