I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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