but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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