There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
