I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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