Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
