(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
