Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
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