I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
