She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
