yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
