I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Randomize
