Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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