I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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