Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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