I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
