How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
