i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize
