roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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