I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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