You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
