also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
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So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
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We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!